25.12.12 @ [
10:24 PM]
нαиγα тυнαи вϊѕα мзмϊѕαнкαи кϊтα
Dear diary . .
I never have someone to share my feelings , other than u & because of that , I've been keeping my sadness & happiness all by myself .
I'm feeling so down right now .
I just need to let it out .
I witnessed it with my own eyes .
Carried her to the kitchen & I cried oh so badly .
Tak pernah terlintas di fikiran aku , that will happen .
Even I myself as her birth mother tak pukol die sampai gitu sekali , so kaw sape nak pukol die macam gitu ?
When brother & I both were young , yes kaw boleh pukol bantai kite sebab kite anak kaw .
Yes kaw boleh pukol bantai mama sebab die milik kaw but never to my kids .
Dah lah kaw tak ajar aku & adik aku ugama .
Sebagai ayah , kaw langsong lah tak ajar kite pape .
Title kaw je ayah pade kite tapi zero .
Infect , kaw tak pernah jadi imam dalam keluarge ni .
Pernah kaw lead kite solat ?
Pernah kaw ajak kite solat ?
Haram . .
Honestly I envy other family .
They went out as a family .
Go swimming , picnic , window shopping , etc .
I never feel that since I was young .
Maybe that's from where I prefer going out with my friends .
Yes sebagai ayah kaw boleh suap aku $$ , nasi .
Kaw sorang je boleh tolong dimase kesusahan aku tapi kaw tak pernah suap aku kebahagian sebagai seorang ayah .
Anything got to do with $$ , yes u can but love ?
It's priceless ayah .
On her left thigh , will always be remembered till the day I die .
Aku ade dalam rumah ni pun pasal anak aku .
Takde anak aku , jangan harap lah aku nak balik .
If only I got a place of my own , aku memang bawak anak aku sekali lah .
I'll just wait for the time , confirm aku bawak anak aku angkat kaki blah dari sini .
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нея ωояδѕ • нзя ѕαγ ♥
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November 2008
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