16.10.10 as usual i did my work .
no pains , nothing .
slept at 0100am & woke up at 0245am due to pain .
was scared & worried at 1st .
i start counting the minutes on contractions .
makin lame makin kerap & lame .
totally up from bed at 0345am & took my shower .
whatever happens , i really wanted to go KK after mother wake up .
so i get myself ready 1st .
listen to lagu nasyid to calm myself down .
alhamdullillah i can control the pain .
0500am mother woke up & ask if im ok , i told her i had pain .
she say tak kan nak beranak , siang lagi & go back to sleep .
i swear i was !@#$ deep in my heart . again waited for her to wake up .
i dont want to force her to wake up sebab tanak susah kan die .
0545am father woke up to solat subuh , mother also wake up .
i told her i wanna go KK .
she quickly take her shower & get herself ready .
while waiting for her , i felt something wet on my pantyliner .
so i went to toilet to check on it .
sekali DARAH !
lagi aku panic .
but still im strong to bare the contractions .
cab there .
taxi driver pulak drop us at the childrens emergency .
do i look like a small kid or what ?
cant he see my tummy is big ?
tsk .
so i walk slowly to women a&e .
dorang pulak ask me to sit on a wheelchair & push me up to delivery suite .
tolak wheelchair punye lah laju .
seram aku .
then masok tempat delivery at 0710am , register ape entah .
then ask if i can tahan the pain or not , i say still can .
then push me inside to bed & have a check on me .
my cervix has already open 6-7cm .
thank god im early sey !
then the lady who check on my cervix told me , " haiyo ! eu giving birth today for sure . "
jantung berdegup makin laju after hearing her say that coz i was totally aint ready .
then push me to labour .
was in there at 0745am tak salah .
then check again my cervix dah 8cm .
punye lah cepat .
the nurse sey around 8 or 9 i can start pushing already .
alhamdullillah im strong enough till i dont induce myself .
i was on my own .
geram part is , aku tanak induce , nurse pakse aku amik gas .
citot betol .
aku tarik pon tak betol .
haha !
blueK !
sekali 0845am i start pushing already .
sempat aku tengok clock .
haha !
push banyak kali uh .
sampai 0947am my daughter was born .
while pushing tu , nurse marah coz i put pressure on my face , not my vagina .
muke aku sampai merah .
when im in ward & look in the mirror , muke aku bukan hanye merah tapi ade tompok merah .
macam frackles gitu tapi in red .
so funny .
haha !
after 0947am , nurse ask if i wanna breastfed baby or bring her up 1st , i told her to bring baby up .
sementare tuh from 0958am till 1050am , kesian aku kene jahit .
again she ask me to take gas .
geram aje .
tak sakit lah tapi part sakit is when she korek aku very deep to check if there is anymore blood clot .
i swear that is very pain sampai aku pekik .
haha !
dalam sey die korek .
fikir pepek aku ni pipe hose washing machine rumah die pe .
rest an hour in labour after sewing then i went up .
aku sampai ward terus berdiri & naik katil .
makcik yang tolak aku tuh pun cakap , " ey budak ni . katil die belum siap , die dah bangun sendiri . "
i just smile .
haha !
she ask if this is my 1st , i say ya .
die cakap kuat ey , tak muntah tak ape .
she say selalu nye anak pertame , mak nye mesti munta² , lemah .
but i was energetic .
again i smile .
thanks to mother for sending me to KK but have to go home coz have to prepare at home pasal hari raya haji mah .
then came cik ala , replace mother .
thanks to cik ala for being there for me during my delivery .
she's the one who gave me all the courage .
then baby selamat keluar , she went home then come again mother to accompany me with bro & father .
father qomat baby once baby went up .
alhamdullillah everything went smooth & my daughter was born on a holy day .
amin !
1st night at hospital i swear i kept looking at the entrance of my ward waiting for my daughter .
but sadly she didnt came .
been crying in ward as i was alone & also start missing my daughter .
i didnt cry when she was born or even when i look at her .
instead , i smiled & was so happy that she's healthy .
i only cried at night coz i missed her .
awww ~
18th morning , 0530am , nurse wake me up to check my temperature & ask if i got any pain .
i say my bladder area very pain .
she ask if i had already pee for the past 6 hours .
i say no & my last urine was 0530pm yesterday .
then she scold me of course lah pain coz eu havent pee .
haha !
i straight away got up from bed & go toilet to pee .
waited for daughetr again .
kept looking at the entrance of my ward .
then at 0800am , she came to me .
aww ~
how i missed eu sayang .
die sampai je aku pelok cium die .
geram aku .
montel semacam .
she was all the way with me except for few hours in between pasal student nurse bath her , then she got her hearing test , BCG , metabolic test .
while she's away , i cried & hoping that she's as healthy as ever .
then her doctor came to me & say ur baby is healthy & she pass every of her test & may go home .
i was so happy to hear that .
but her sakit kuning result was 111 .
tsk ~
normal should be below 100 .
see how lah today coz she's away right now gone for her 1st check up send my her 2 lovely grandparent .
1st night with her last night was a disaster .
she didnt sleep .
nangis aje .
muke sampai merah , biji mate sampai nak terkeluar .
naik takot aku .
aku dari fed up jadi sedih & nangis tengok keadaan die .
lame-kelamean aku tidur tanpe sedar die tidur or not .
haha !
when i was awake , she's crying .
bad bad mother .
lucky today she behave so well .
showered her myself without anyone teaching me .
shampoo-ed her hair , soap her leg & buttock & all .
clean her ears , neck .
same time was crying .
so didnt took me that long to shower her .
after shower she was sound asleep .
anak aku tuh kuat nyusu taok !
newborn especially 2nd day berak 2 - 3 times only tapi anak aku semalam berak da 4 times eu know .
citot !
tetek aku pulak problem , susu tak keluar .
haha !
so fed her formula for now .
belum keras lagi sey tetek aku .
kesian die tapi takpe .
she did have her 1st few breastfeeding .
so she did take lah the 1st few vitamins .
now im tired of blogging .
will update when i want to .
now , i wanna rest while waiting for her to be back home .
miss her already sey .
blueK !
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19.11.10 @ [3:33 PM] 
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November 2008
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